MONKEYSAYS

ENVELOPMENT

"Hello?"

"Yo. Is that you?"

"It is," I said. "And who is this?"

"I can't believe you didn't recognize my voice," F said.

"It's been a while," I said. "Some years, in fact."

"It wasn't that long ago that you don't remember quite a lot about those
times," F said. "I hear you've been writing about them."

"I'd hardly call it writing," I said. "Just little bits I knock off in my
spare time. For my own amusement."

"I hear you've been publishing these 'little bits,'" F said.

"Blog stuff. It's hardly publishing," I said. "No one reads it anyway."

"Some people have been reading it," F said. "I, for example, know all about
it. And I don't think writing about that stuff is such a good idea."

"What I've got up there is pretty harmless," I said. "If not entirely
innocuous."

"So far," said F, 'but I don't like where it's going."

"If you're worried about legalities, there's something called the statute of limitations, you
know," I said.

"For your information, on some things, there's no time limit," F said.

"Jesus Christ," I said. "I was never sure what happened that night. I was
going to take a literary license when I got to that part."

"I'm not saying what happened one way or the other," F said. "I'm just
saying there's no reason to open up a potential can of worms for nothing.
Why would you even consider writing about that?"

"It's practice," I said. "I'm just trying to see if I can sustain a
narrative."

"I think you're feeling guilty," F said. "You're trying to confess like
this, hoping to get caught. Like some sicko."

"Why would I be feeling guilty? I asked. "I never, uh, did what happened.
I doubt I was ever legally even an accomplice."

"They could say you benefited financially from that thing," F said.

"I remember borrowing some money," I said. "That's all really. Just a
loan."

"Did you ever pay me back?" F asked.

"Absolutely," I said. "Surely you remember a night when you got a pizza
delivery and one of the boxes was stuffed with dollar bills?"

"That was you?"

“Absolutely."

"Then what's your angle?" F asked. "How much do they pay you for writing
that thing?"

"There is no they," I said. " And there is no money in blogging."

"I know you're up to something," F said. "And as soon as I found out what
it is, we'll talk again."

"Sure," I said. "No problem. Keep in touch."